Comparison--something we all get caught up with that has the power to take so much joy out of the one life we have to live!

Whether you're comparing yourself to someone you know like a close friend or family member, or someone you don't really know like that girl from the gym or a random person on social media, comparing yourself to others only leaves you feeling worse than before.

Today I want to dive into what food comparison is, why you shouldn't shame yourself for the way others are eating, and discuss ways in which you can stop comparing your plate or eating habits to those around you!

Food Comparison

What is it?

When you find yourself judging your eating habits or changing the way in which you eat to match those of others you're comparing yourself too, this is known as food comparison.

We all compare ourselves in so many aspects of life. When it comes to food, we often judge ourselves based on the type and amount of food we are eating compared to others.

For example, let's say you're out to eat with friends. You all decide to order and split a large pizza. When that pizza arrives, you're excited and hungry so you grab a couple slices and dig in. The pizza is so delicious and satisfying, but you still feel a little hungry by the time you finish the first 2 slices.

You start to wonder if you really need that third slice. You look around the table and see no one else has gone for a third slice yet, so why should you? You second-guess and say to yourself "I'll only eat another slice if someone else does." Whether someone goes for that third slice and you eat another piece, or whether no one goes for a third slice and you're left feeling hungry, you've just allowed how others are eating to impact you!

Another example could come from the influence of someone you don't know. Let's say you're scrolling through social media and pass by a fitness influencers account. You see she's sharing one of those "What she eats in a day" videos.

You start comparing her body and eating habits to yours after watching one post she put up! You then decide you want to try to eat more like her so you can look like her. This is food comparison and body comparison wrapped up in one, as they do tend to go hand in hand!

Why do we compare our eating habits to others anyways?

As humans, we have this subconscious drive to compare ourselves to others. It's one of the ways we evaluate our own self and see how we are doing compared to others. This is known as Social Comparison Theory, which was first proposed in 1954 by a psychologist Leon Festinger.

The problem with comparison

Of course, the first big problem with comparison is that it normally leaves us feeling bad about ourselves. The second problem with comparing yourself to others is that you likely forget to take into consideration that every single person has different circumstances that got them to where they are today and every single person has different needs based on their day-to-day life!

So while you may think you should be more like that person you're comparing yourself too, the truth is, there is no real comparison when your circumstances and day-to-day life could be very different.

Why you should no longer compare your plate or eating habits to other people's

As I said above, every single person's needs are different from day-to-day and a lot of outside factors like sleep, stress, nutrition, movement, relationships, etc influence our needs each day as well.

Let's go back to the pizza example while out to dinner with your girlfriends. Remember in this example you ate 2 slices and were still hungry and your friends ate 2 slices and stated they were full, so you decided to not eat anymore as well.

While you feel shameful that you were still hungry and they were not, here's what could be really going on:

1. You forgot that you were on our feet a lot today for work and then missed lunch because you were so busy, so you were likely more hungry than normal because of that

2. Friend #1 was still hungry too but is struggling with her own eating habits and body image (unknown to you), so she decided not to eat more than 2 slices just as you did

3. Friend #2 was glued to her computer working for 8 hours of the day, only getting up to eat and go to the bathroom. She didn't really move her body a ton today and felt satisfied by 2 slices

4. Friend #3 has a dairy intolerance and didn't want to eat more than 2 slices since she knew her stomach would pay for it later if she ate more than that

As you can see, each person's circumstances are different! So while you may think it's normal to compare your eating habits to them, it really doesn't make sense to do so once you realize each person had a different day, with different outside influences.

The steps to take to stop comparing (not just what's on your plate)

These steps I'm about to give you will relate mainly to how you can stop comparing what you eat to others, but you can definitely apply these tips to your everyday life too.

Step 1: Recognize the thoughts you no longer want to have

I firmly believe we all have the power to change our own thoughts, but in order to do so, you first have to recognize the thoughts you no longer want to have!

If it's your goal to stop comparing yourself to others, especially when it comes to your eating habits, then be aware of those thoughts and be intentional about noticing them. That way you can actively start to change them and eventually create that new reality for yourself over time!

Step 2: Decide what thoughts are true or untrue

Once you start recognizing the thoughts you no longer want to have, take a moment and assess them. Then decide whether the thought you're having is actually true or not.

For example, are you truly bad or unhealthy just because you decided to eat pizza when your friend got a salad? Or is that just a thought you've lead yourself to believe for years of your life...?

I'll leave you with this: Just because you have a thought, doesn't make it true!

Step 3: Reframe those untrue comparison thoughts

In order to truly end those negative and untrue comparison thoughts, it's important to reframe them to more positive ones! The more you replace your negative thoughts with positive ones, the more those new positive thoughts become your reality.

So instead of saying something like, "I should have ordered salad like she did, she's probably judging me for being unhealthy and ordering pizza", say this instead, "Pizza is what sounded the best to me right now and I'm not unhealthy for eating pizza either." Plus, if you would have gotten the salad instead of the pizza when the pizza is what really sounded the best to you, you'll likely leave dinner feeling unsatisfied and looking for something else to eat when you get home.

Here are a couple other gentle reminders you can give yourself when recognizing and reframing your untrue thoughts:

1. Remind yourself over and over that your body's needs and cravings are completely different than anyone else's

2. Understand that you likely have no idea how that person you're comparing yourself to takes care of themselves and remember that they could be struggling with food and their body image just like you

3. Stay mindful of your own hunger and cravings and honor that! By honoring your hunger, you'll be less likely to overeat later on

A Final Word on Comparison

As you work to stop comparing your plate and eating habits to others, remember to be kind to yourself moving forward.

Just because you don't want to have those negative comparison thoughts anymore, doesn't mean they won't pop up from time to time because it's normal and we are human! In theory, our brains are wired to compare ourselves to others.

But you can most definitely limit those negative comparison thoughts by taking the steps above.

What other tips do you have to stop comparing yourself to others?